Coping with the Holidays: Grief, Joy, Gratitude & Reclaiming Traditions

Beloved community,

November arrives carrying both warmth and weight. For many Black and Brown professionals, the holiday season is not just about family gatherings or festive meals — it’s also a time when grief gets louder, memories get fuller, and expectations from work, family, and culture feel heavier.

At Revived Soul Wellness, we honor the both/and —

✨ both the joy and the ache

✨ both the grief and the gratitude

✨ both the traditions we keep and the ones we outgrow

✨ both the rest we need and the celebration we desire

This month’s theme invites you to move at the speed of your nervous system, honor what’s true, and practice liberation through intentional softness.

🌿 Coping with the Holidays When You’re Grieving

Grief during the holidays can show up in many ways:

• Feeling emotionally tender or irritable

• Avoiding gatherings or feeling disconnected during them

• Overwhelm when planning traditions that loved ones used to anchor

• Feeling guilty for experiencing joy

• Numbness, exhaustion, or the desire to “just get through it”

  
  

Here is your reminder: Grief is not a burden — it’s evidence of love. And love deserves space.

Liberation-centered reframe: You do not have to perform joy to make others comfortable. Your emotional truth is sacred.

🌱 Navigating Joy & Gratitude Without Self-Abandonment

Gratitude isn’t about “pretending everything is fine.” It’s about locating the light without denying the shadows. This season, joy can be:

• A phone call that feels like oxygen

• A quiet morning without requests

• Dancing while cooking

• Resting without apology

• Honoring the version of you who survived this year

  
  

Your joy is a birthright — not a reward you earn through overwork or endurance.

🔥 Reclaiming & Reimagining Traditions

For first-gen, high-achieving, BIPOC professionals, traditions often come with:

• Emotional labor

• Family expectations

• Being the host, planner, organizer, fixer, or peacemaker

  
  

This year, consider creating traditions that honor your capacity and your healing. Some ideas include:

✨ A solo gratitude walk

✨ A holiday playlist that reflects your cultural roots

✨ A new recipe that brings joy instead of stress

✨ A “no drama, no draining conversations” boundary

✨ A memorial ritual (lighting a candle, cooking a loved one’s favorite dish)

✨ A chosen family brunch or Zoom call

✨ A rest-only morning — no obligations

Liberation-centered permission: You do not have to hold every tradition your family gave you. You are allowed to create rituals that honor your nervous system, your spiritual needs, and your evolving identity.

🌀 Somatic Check-In for the Holiday Season

Try this before a gathering, after a triggering conversation, or anytime your body feels full:

The “Letting-Down” Breath

1. Place one hand on your heart and one on your belly.

2. Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds.

3. Exhale slowly through your mouth for 6–8 seconds, imagining your shoulders melting downward.

4. Whisper to yourself: “I get to take up space.”

5. Repeat 3–5 times.

   
   

This helps unblend from activated parts (protector, overwhelmed, caretaker) and return to Self-energy — grounded, compassionate, present.

📝 Journal Prompts for November

Use these to anchor yourself in truth, grief, and liberation:

1. What part of me feels the heaviest this holiday season? What does it need from me?

2. What traditions no longer fit who I am becoming?

3. What is one new ritual I want to create for myself or my family?

4. Where does joy live in my body right now? Even if small.

5. What am I grieving, and how can I honor that grief with tenderness instead of pressure?

6. What boundaries feel like acts of liberation for me this year?

7. How can I practice gratitude without performing emotional perfection?

   
   

🎶 November Healing Playlist

💛 Final Note: You Deserve Softness This Season

As we move toward the end of the year, may this November be a month of:

✨ Reclaiming your energy

✨ Honoring your grief

✨ Choosing joy that doesn’t drain you

✨ Nurturing traditions that feel aligned

✨ Centering your liberation, not obligation

Whether you’re spending the holidays with family, chosen family, or in sacred solitude — you are worthy of gentleness, rest, and care.

Revived Soul Wellness is here to walk with you, not just through celebrations, but through the tender middle spaces where healing truly happens.

With love & liberation, Felicia, LCSW

Revived Soul Wellness & Consultation

Virtual therapy for Black and Brown professionals across New York & Massachusetts

🌍 Embracing Our Collective Healing Journey

As we navigate this season, let’s remember that healing is not a solitary journey. We are interconnected, and our experiences shape one another. Embracing our collective healing means recognizing the power of community.

The Importance of Connection

In moments of grief, connection can be a lifeline. Reach out to those who understand your journey. Share your stories, your struggles, and your triumphs. This is not just about individual healing; it’s about creating a tapestry of support that uplifts us all.

Creating Safe Spaces

Let’s commit to creating safe spaces where we can express our authentic selves. Spaces where vulnerability is met with compassion. In these spaces, we can explore our emotions without fear of judgment. We can celebrate our victories, no matter how small, and honor our grief without feeling the need to rush through it.

Reclaiming Our Narratives

This season, let’s reclaim our narratives. We have the power to define our experiences, to choose how we respond to the challenges we face. Our stories are valid, and they deserve to be told. By sharing our truths, we not only empower ourselves but also inspire others to do the same.

The Role of Self-Care

Self-care is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. As we move through this holiday season, prioritize your well-being. Engage in practices that nourish your spirit. Whether it’s through meditation, creative expression, or simply taking time to rest, honor your needs. You are deserving of care and compassion.

Conclusion: A Call to Action

Let us move forward together, embracing the complexities of this season. Acknowledge your grief, celebrate your joy, and honor your journey. Remember that you are not alone. Together, we can create a community rooted in love, understanding, and liberation.

As we navigate this holiday season, let’s commit to supporting one another. Let’s uplift our voices and share our stories. In doing so, we not only heal ourselves but also contribute to the collective healing of our beloved community.

You are worthy. You are enough. You are loved.